SCENE: Space Station Break Room. A bulletin board on the wall says ‘Security is Our Priority. It has been 0 days since an Incursion.’ PCEJ1 and PCEJ2 sit at the break table scooping paddles full of an unidentified glowing piezoelectric energy syrup into purple orifices.
PCEJ1: (sits down at the table and begins slurping his energy syrup) ….Hey, morning. What’s up with Doug? He’s been shut up in his office all morning. Usually he comes down about now to tell us how to do our job and make himself feel all important.
PCEJ2: (mouth full) ….yeah he was looking kinda amethyst when he got back through the portal.
PCEJ1: (coughs and spits out syrup)….he went through the portal? (looks over his shoulder at the door to make sure no one is listening.) No way, I never thought he would get off his ass and do it.
PCEJ2: (sets down his paddle) What did you do?
PCEJ1: I may have ‘insinuated’ that some of the crew were talking about forming a union. You know, because of all the extra Boarder-Repelling and Corpse Disposal we’ve been doing that is not in our job description. I looked it up in the manual.
PCEJ2: Oh yeah, just now he totally went down there to put up a sign. Said there was like a whole meatbag village on the other side…. no wonder there’s like a steady stream of them….said they started screaming and pointing and getting all agitated and he shot a few of them and then scampered back to his office.
PCEJ1: Think anyone followed him?
PCEJ2: So what if they did. What are they gonna do, come stab me with their pointy stick? Wait did you hear that?
PCEJ1: (listening) What?
PCEJ2: For a second it sounded like some big wanna-be hero meatbag smashing his way through a bunch of our guys….
(They both laugh and slurp at their energy syrup)